When was the last time you questioned who you are and what you stand for? The chances are it was quite a while ago because, like most people, you take yourself for granted. Few of us think in enough depth about our beliefs, yet they are essential to our very being. Before embarking on a course of personal development, we need to confront our beliefs head on.
A belief is a feeling of conviction about something specifically related to yourself. Beliefs have a direct  impact on our character and behaviour. We can divide beliefs in to two simple categories – positive and negative. A positive belief leads to positive actions like setting goals and targets. Negative beliefs are associated with negative behaviours – like self paranoia. Beliefs are activated by different personality traits.  In the case of negative beliefs, the inner critic is a major contributor.
The little voice we hear in our head sometimes telling us we are no good is what life coaches refer to as the inner critic. An inner critic is fine and actually important in small doses. However, if the balance becomes upset, our inner critic can become a detrimental force. All the hard work you may have put into building yourself up can be wiped away in an instant by an unchecked inner critic.
On the other hand, we have the inner coach. This is the voice of confidence and encouragement. It is the voice of hope and the gateway to success. Your inner coach is the part of you that checks for solutions not problems. The inner coach provides you with inspiration and vitality. When it comes to building success, your inner coach is the voice to listen to.  
You should decide which of the two voices are the loudest in your mind. Are you your own coach or your own worst enemy? It is far easier to criticise than to make something which is why the inner critic tends to be the most prevalent in ordinary people. Extraordinary people have that little bit extra. Extraordinary people have a finely tuned inner coach.
All you are doing by developing your inner coach is making your mind work for you. Think for a second about how incredible the human brain is. It is more powerful than all the worlds computers combined. The brain contains within it almost limitless potential. What a shame it is, therefore, to use it against us rather than for us! We all have the chance to be extraordinary, yet so many people sit in the doldrums because they are unable to harness the latent power of the mind.
The mind can waste a lot of energy on detrimental beliefs. Remember that a belief is not a fact! You should not think that what you believe about yourself today is necessarily true. People have had some crazy beliefs over the years. For instance, entire cultures have developed on the belief of the world being flat, or that gods live up in the sky. Unless you have taken the time to explore yourself, you run the risk of holding some unhelpful beliefs about yourself. But where do beliefs come from?
Some of our beliefs originate in our childhood. The opinions of our elders shape our self image in childhood. Therapists spend a lot of their time unravelling problematic self images of people that begin in childhood. It is amazing to think that our childhood never really leaves us. Instead, it becomes buried to the very core of our being. Life is a process of change and development. However, without being aware of the things that have made us who we are there is little chance of us controlling this change.

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I want to talk about the concept of change. And how important it is in your personal growth goals. It’s in the nature of human beings to be ever-changing people. Even if you sat down today and drew a list of all the things you are and know it’ll be wrong by tomorrow. This is because each day you change a little, age very slightly and gather new experiences. Why then are so many people frightened by the idea of change? Why are so many of us nostalgic for the past? Perhaps one of the reasons for this is due to a fear of the unknown? In order to get over any fears you might have about change, you need to consider yourself to be a work in progress. Every skill you acquire or interest you develop produces a change within you. The best way to react in this situation is to hold a flexible attitude to life. Even if you are experiencing something negative, something challenging, or something mundane, you will develop and grow accordingly. However, there are always going to be something’s you can’t change about yourself. Sometimes you can improve a little, but sometimes you can’t change at all. If you are a fully grown adult and five feet tall, you are unlikely to make yourself 6 foot through determination to change alone. Keep your goals realistic by recognising in which areas you can become more adaptive and reflexive. Living happily is about accepting your limitations without putting yourself down for them. Part of the process of change is to make mistakes. Human beings are far from being infallible, Part of the process of learning as human being is to make mistakes and learn from them. The more we learn from our mistakes the more we learn about who we are as people. Whatever doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. It is essential that we become more forgiving of ourselves if we want to remain adaptive. Becoming hung up over the past will only serve to make us less resilient in the face of trouble. Incorporating self-accepting beliefs into your life can really make a difference in your life. A very good reason why they are so helpful is because the encourage correction not admonishment. When you have self-accepting beliefs you become encouraged to address shortcomings without being negative about them. When problems occur or you behave poorly, you can experience appropriate and proportionate negative emotions. In general, people are better problem solvers when they are not emotionally distressed! Do you know anyone who is entirely perfect? If you have only conditional self-belief, you believe that you stop being worthwhile if you fail to meet a very narrow set of conditions. Placing extreme restrictions on yourself will be counterproductive in the end. It is far better to be honest and openminded. Remember, just because you prefer to behave in a certain way doesn’t mean you that you must behave in a certain way. Nor, does your failure to act in that way make you somehow inferior. Instead, this ‘failure’ supports the idea that you’re a fallible human capable of behaving in differing ways at various times. In essence, failure is sign of your uniqueness as a human being. Learn the lesson from it and move on. You should become more than a product of success and failure, for being adaptive means loving learning. Becoming comfortable with yourself is essential for adapting to change and countering the negative aspects of life. You need to be able to forgive yourself for the mistakes you make in your life as part of the process of benefiting from change. Learn to judge not from your mistakes, but from your triumphs. After all isn’t a mistake just a side effect of learning? It is through this process that you become a vibrant and unique individual.

Taking change seriously does not mean you have to take yourself too seriously though. Accepting your shortcomings, and learning to laugh at yourself, will do you far more good than dwelling on the past. However, do not fall in to the trap of thinking you are who you are and that’s the end of it ; if you overstep the mark in your behaviour, then you cannot just accept that and move on. Becoming more adaptive is a process of both a willingness and acceptance of embracing change.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

 I want to talk to you about how to create authentic confidence. As you’ll see there is a difference between authentic confidence and the “fake it till you make it” type.
It might sound strange to hear  that there is more than one type of confidence. This is because some behaviours that may appear to be from a confident person are actually not confident at all. What is true confidence?  Well, true confidence is a natural demeanour or aura that is generated from an individual. Its opposite – false confidence  – can be witnessed in day to day life in the form of attention seeking behaviour.
What characterises this behaviour is that it lacks genuineness. It plays to the gallery. There are telltale signs like the sideways glance to see who’s looking, the exaggerated body language, the overly projected tone of voice.

Knowing that these thoughts are there is an important first stage in overcoming attention-seeking behaviour. They will be negative thoughts like: “I fear that I’m not good enough, everyone here is better than me”, or “I’m not attractive, nobody loves me”. You can stop the whole process right there and then by challenging these beliefs with: “Of course I’m good, I’m just as good as the next person” or ‘I’m attractive and loveable but I do need to be bolder and chat to people,” for example.
But life is life and perhaps we let these thoughts ferment. All is not lost however. You can recognise the feelings that accompany your thoughts and then take action. If you feel undermined, insecure, ignored or unrewarded then be aware of your particular emotional triggers to attention-seeking behaviour. Go back to thoughts that generated the feeling or simply relax and take some time out to examine what is going on.
So how do we rid ourselves of false confident behaviour and replace it with true confidence? The answer is contained in the subtle minutiae of everyday live.   The way we conduct ourselves through our body language and tone of voice has a massive impact on the way we are judged by others.  So where should you begin ? Move around as though you’re confident – and this goes for standing and sitting also. You’ll feel confident as a result – it’s that simple, but our minds can get in the way. Ignore your mind for a while. We are psycho-physical beings. If we change our physical behaviour we change our mindset; if we change our mindset we can change our behaviour.
Learn to listen. Nod and smile, question and encourage. Try to actually find out if this energy-taking person you find so hard to deal with has something to say – you might be pleasantly surprised. Also, if you give an example of how to do something well, others may be encouraged to follow your example.

There is something else that every person with self confidence has and you can have it too. Every self confidence person has strong values, beliefs and faith. If you have strong values then, no matter what you do or if you make mistakes,  people will admire the power and force within you to do what you have to do to achieve your goals.
There are different ways that people face lack of self confidence, some people have just a strong fear of something and they don’t know what to do about it. But other people have such a low self esteem that they dont feel capable of doing anything by themselves, they feel the need of someone else to do it for them.

Take risks, talk to you self any time you have negative thoughts and change them to positive thoughts. You should not let negativity or fears conquer you, they are usually false fears that are just in your mind.
Self evaluate yourself, don’t compare yourself with other people, there is no point in that, every person has different strengths and limitations, you are good at some things that other people are not good at.
Try to improve yourself every day by pushing yourself a little bit more, set clear goals of what you want to achieve and how you want to achieve it. Manage your mind,  don’t let your negative thought create negative feelings you can change it and commit to success, this way you are going to be more confident and successful at anything you do.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

A positive frame of mind is important for so many reasons. Positive thinking is proven to enhance performance in productivity and quality. We tend to think more creatively and perform better when we are feeling positive and well.  When you are on top form, your confidence levels will go through the roof and this can only help you in your work and personal life. If you can sustain yourself with regular challenges and honest self appraisal, the benefits are enormous.
Fear induces us to put the brakes on, to stop thinking in a productive way.  Fear of poverty, of losing face, of being proved wrong hold us back from taking part in active decision making. As our judgement becomes clouded with negative thinking, we become timid in the face of adversity. Opportunity becomes redefined as an impossible challenge and we end up standing still whilst the rest of the world passes us by. Negative emotions are emotions such as anger, fear, anxiety, jealousy regret, sadness. These emotions are capable of not only having a powerful, unwanted effect on you physically, but also of having a significant impact the way you conduct your life. Negative emotions can engrain habits of limiting decision making.

One of the benefits of personal development is that it can encourage all the healthy parts of you to grow and the less savoury parts to whither on the vine.  It can improve our general well being and make us more harmonious inside. All of our emotional processes, attitudes, values, our beliefs and motivations are interconnected.

If life was easy then we would have nothing to be motivated for. That is why by bringing in other challenges and goals – be it learning another language or taking up a new creative hobby – you can develop a highly disciplined mind that will assist you in many other areas of life. Maintaining confidence and motivation is the secret to long term success. However, long term success is achieved from short term goals! What this means is through setting smaller goals and then rewarding yourself for achieving them on a regular basis.

Thinking well is being well. There are only a minority of people who achieve success without having any belief in them self or in what they are doing. Be proud of the positive steps you have decided to take in asserting control over your life

Think well of yourself. Change negative self-talk to positive self-encouragement. Give yourself the same consideration you would give a cherished friend. Learn to become your own cheer leader instead of your own worst critic. Once you have banished these negative thoughts, you should turn your attention towards coming up with an action plan. This plan will form the bedrock of your positive state of mind. You can take this even further by putting reward days into the planner to act as an extra bit of motivation. By breaking your routine down into a series of short term goals you will have more fun and experience a greater sense of accomplishment along the way. Of course this will only work if you are honest and open with yourself. Your journal should never lie otherwise you are only telling lies to yourself and defeating the object of your goal.  

Your plan should be customised according to your own personal set of requirements and informed judgement. The effects of this are that you will be proving to yourself that you can take control of your own destiny. With a clear structure in place, you will never lose focus of the task in hand. This will help to avoid the feelings of helplessness and submissiveness that can happen to people who feel like they are not in control of a situation.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

Your general mental health stems from how mentally equipped you are to deal with setbacks. Even the most hardened people have , at one time or another, suffered from a mental collapse. If you feel that you find it difficult to cope with the way the world is, you are not alone.  There are many ways we can develop stress and depression because of the sensitive nature of being human,
Sadly, there is still a lot of stigma surrounding issues around mental health. If we fall ill with a physical disease, we are a lot more open to telling others. Feeling down is often seen by the individual as a sign of weakness. If you fall into this category, please take these feelings seriously.
What is it that gives us mental strength? Well, some of it seems to be genetic. Mental health is well documented to be partially attributable to hereditary factors. Experience is also very important when it comes to mental strength. If we are happy with our current lifestyle, we also feel more confident in who we are. If you feel that you need to build up your mental toughness, there are a number of things you can do.
You should talk to people who can help you when you encounter problems. Too many times, people bottle up their emotions from others. Sometimes what we need is a friend who can be there for you. If you develop low feelings that become overwhelming, you should speak to a doctor or other professionals.
A reality check is needed every now and again when things get on top of you. You need to think whether you are taking too much on your plate. Try to keep a focus on your priorities. It can be tempting to try to take on more and more things to forget about feeling low, this is a self defeating strategy. Be smart in the choosing the extra activities you take on; for instance, take up a sport or hobby that builds your emotional strength up.
If there is one word you should remember when it comes to mental strength, it is balance. Balance means that you have a sense that all the important parts of your life are working together in harmony. Each individual has a different concept of balance. This is because we all lead individual lives with different needs. Your sense of balance may change at different stages of your life. You may work longer hours than most, but if it gives you the financial rewards you crave and the time to do them , then you are likely to feel stable and balanced. However, when we are feeling off balance the slightest thing can tip us over the edge. Once we become overwhelmed we are unable to make clear decisions.
The secret to balance is to remain in control of yourself and your goals, to keep moving forwards.
Your sense of balance will change along with your life priorities. As a young adult,  you may find balance through your social life. When you get older, other things such as job security may become more important. Once you reach the middle of your life , you may have become financially secure and want to rediscover yourself again. Taking some time out regularly to consider where you are and where you come from is important. Think carefully about what is important to you in respect of balance and stability.
We make many assumptions about what we ‘need’ to be happy in life. Some of this is because of intimate social pressures such as family, friends, and wider social pressures such as the mass media. The truth is only you know what is best for you. Learn to trust your instincts more and listen to your inner voice. Think hard about whether there is too much going on in your life at the moment. Are your family suffering because you have taken too much on at work? Ask yourself what you would be doing in an ideal world? Then try to implement a strategy that allows you to get as close to it as possible.
Never underestimate the importance of balance in your life.  Getting the balance right will improve your quality of life beyond your wildest dreams. Remember to seek help when it is necessary,  but don’t lose sight of the responsibility you owe to yourself.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

 

The significance of change in its effects on mankind is not to be underestimated. It has been our ability to change and adapt that has made us the most successful animals on the planet. If we were not capable of change there would be no houses, cars, aeroplanes or computers . In times of need Human beings have effected change in their behaviour  in order to save lives.
The power of change extends to the external world around us not just to ourselves. We continue to shape our environment  in order to make life more  safe or comfortable just as our ancestors did. The radical changes of the 20th century have changed our lives so profoundly that it is hard to imagine any other way of living. It is the rapid pace of change that creates new challenges to overcome. It is also true to say that the rapid pace  of change also creates new opportunities for us to embrace as well.
The successful person is always willing to adapt and change with the world around them. The really successful person is one who is able to create change in the  world around them.  An aware and inquisitive mind is a must have. Therefore, the successful person must be sensitive to the goings on in the world around them.  A top businessman, for example,  needs to be conscious of gaps in the market that they are ready to exploit.

A positive frame of mind will  form the base of  a can do attitude. People who think positively are far more likely to  see challenges rather than problems or opportunities rather than difficulties.. The positive mental attitude of the successful businessmen means that opportunity becomes a reality ; because they also have the drive and motivation to succeed and make their dream come true . So as you can see there is much to be gained from developing a state of optimism in your character about change.  The problem for a lot of people is in developing it and overcoming bad habits.

One of the reasons top businessman are able to adapt and change so readily is because they remain optimistic in their appraisal of change. Rather than running terrified of the unknown successful business people are eternal optimists.   A change equals a fresh opportunity, it is no surprise that the most dynamic and successful people are those who change and adapt accordingly to the environment and the situation. It fits in with what Darwin called ‘survival of the  fittest’ . The most successful species are those that have adapted to their environment and made adaption’s to change when necessary. Therefore take confident that change is part and   parcel of living. Without it we would become stagnant and boring. Therefore  develop optimism– optimists are self-disciplined and persistent in what they want to achieve in their life. Optimists plan and take action to move forward. They constantly learn about how to get better at their skills. Their self-confidence helps them to look for solutions and lead them to success in their goals. If you are pessimistic it is time you shed your pessimistic attitude and develop optimism in its place. There is no place in the world of success for negative attitudes. Think about what you can do rather than what you cannot.
It is  certainly true to say  about humanity that we tend to regard what we are not good at as more significant than what we are. Appraisals at work tend to provide feedback on areas that require improvement whereas school reports may be full of praise but are always encouraging growth and development in other areas. Focusing on deficiencies is certainly important for self improvement. But being overly critical and analytical is not. The trick is to find the balance, it is important to remind yourself what you are good at if you are to have the confidence to tackle other things.
   
Having the courage to learn and change may not necessarily make you a happy person, but it will help you negotiate hard times more smoothly and successfully as well as learn from these experiences.  Knowing how your brain works helps you know when and how to intervene in managing your mind to make the process of adaptation happen more smoothly and perhaps more quickly.  It also helps you monitor both the conscious and unconscious spheres of your mind and gives you feedback about whether you are adapting successfully.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

Life is not all plain sailing. Indeed, hardship, trials and tribulations are part of parcel of being. Encountering difficulty is not a bad thing -what matters is the way we deal with it. A positive frame of mind is important for personal development for so many reasons. Positive thinking is proven to enhance performance in productivity and quality. We tend to think more and actively and perform better when we are feeling positive and well. There are biological explanations of this. A positive frame of mind is due to enhanced levels of neuro transmitters like serotonin that regulate the performance capabilities of the brain. The knock on effects of a positive frame of mind also include better health – not just better mental health but better in the physical sense. This is due to the boost to the immune system that a positive frame of mind can give you from positive hormones . The reverse is also true, when we are depressed we are far more liable to contracting other diseases and mental health issues. Our relationships with others deteriorate and therfore our personal development, we begin to think irrationally and our productivity can ground to a direct halt. In short this is a frame of mind that is best to avoid at all costs. Feeling unhappy from time to time is not unusual- but how we choose to deal with a problem comes from our default state of mind. A positive mental attitude is also about giving you a can do attitude. People who think positively are far more likely to see challenges rather than problems or opportunities rather than difficulties. For instance, entrepreneurs who are successful often are because they are able to spot opportunities for growth in a market which others only see problems in. The positive mental attitude of the successful businessmen means that opportunity becomes a reality , because they also have the drive and motivation to succeed and make their dream come true . So as you can see there is much to be gained in personal development from a positive mental attitude. The problem for a lot of people is in developing one in the first place. It is true that some people seem to be more positive than others. Having a so called ‘ sunny disposition’ implies that there is something inherent or genetic to account for a frame of mind. While this may be true in some cases it is also true that a positive frame of mind is not an attribute for a privlleged few. It is something that is open to anybody. Anyone, that is, who is prepared to put the necessary work in to attain personal development. Developing a positive frame of mind is not some new aged fad. For centuries religious men and scholars alike searched for and developed techniques to harness an inner harmony. While this may have begun to make one closer to god the essence of this idea is just as relevant today. That a positive frame of mind makes us closer to the divine while a negative frame of mind can only lead us in to ways of being that are a detriment to our lives. Monks realised this long ago which is why they devote themselves to a life of abstinence and mental and spiritual fulfilment. One of the best ways to determine your frame of mind is to think about how you are with other people. A great way to do this is to picture how you behave towards people you do not know. Are you outgoing and open to meeting and talking with others? Or are you insular and afraid. Believe it or not one of the best ways to overcome a negative frame of mind is to change your attitude to the world around you and that means the people in it as well. If you are usually uncomfortable around others then try this experiment. One night force yourself to strike up a conversation at random in a public place. Do not be concerned about how you look or appear – or what you talk about. A reference about the weather or anything will do. Just try it and note how you feel afterwards. You see, the way you are with others will affect the opportunities you get offered. Think about it in this way – who is the most likely to get the furthest in a workplace between two people of equal ability and experience except for one difference- One is uptight and ill at ease with others around them the other easy going comfortable in the company of others. If I was the boss of those two people I know which one I would pick for a promotion.

 

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com

Confidence is a word that we hear a lot of these days. Success in work and in our desire to build personal development is said to stem from it. Indeed there are very few situations in life where a lack of confidence is considered to be an advantage. It is through confidence that we manage to assert ourselves in the world. You might find it strange then to know that such a crucial part of our personalities has had very little in research made into it. If you stop and think about it a second – if we are to build personal development we need an understanding about what makes us tick then knowing about the things that affect our confidence is pretty important.The world you live in is obviously going to be a major contributor to your level of confidence. Of course in our modern fast paced world there are many factors involved in our confidence levels. Anyone who tells you that they are ‘their own person’ is not being strictly true. The truth is that we react to the world around us according to the belief we have in ourselves. Personal development and self belief comes through the gaining of knowledge.

Think of your first day in a new job for instance, to begin with you were likely to be hesitant , unsure , looking for confirmation from others that you are doing the right thing. Fast forward 6 months later and think of the difference in outlook and attitude. You have grown into the role, you are more assertive because you have gained the necessary knowledge to complete your tasks according to a set standard. In short, you have become more confident because you believe in your ability to get the job done. Now you might think confidence gained in one area of your life can not be applied to all areas. This is a common misconception because it fails to grasp the principle of gaining confidence. Lets think about where confidence comes from. Like most of our personal development – confidence seems to stem from our biological make up and our experiences in childhood. In the same way some kids seem to be born to be top golfers or footballers . Others are naturally pre disposed to being confident out going people. Yet there are also many many things that impact on us as kids when we grow up.

Parents can be a major contributor towards us acquiring confidence. Good parenting should be about teaching their child to build personal development and explore their own individual potential. Unfortunately , some parents do quite the opposite – perhaps with the same good intentions but often with disastrous consequences for the child’s personal development . For instance, rather than examining their childs potential they instead seize upon their limitations. By directly focusing on these negative aspects to the extent that they over shadow everything else the child can grow up with little self belief and confidence. Another key contributor to our personalities and levels of confidence is our experiences in school. So many people who have an unhappy childhood do so due to their experiences in the play ground and the classroom. Being accepted by our peers can make or break our confidence levels.

Then of course there is the role of the mass media and advertising. However, in this case we are dealing with something a little different to what we have discussed before. Let’s face it we as a society are addicted to buying stuff it is in our nature. Yet why do we buy? More often than not it is to make up for shortcomings we feel we have in our selves. For decades ,marketing folk have been aware of the power of placing a brand with the idea that it will instil confidence. The fact is that this is not selling confidence but exploiting a lack of it. A distinction we should all remember the next tim we are out shopping!

These are just some of the ways confidence and our ideas of confidence are formed. If you are not a very confident person then perhaps you have seen some things in common between your own upbringing and some of the examples we have looked at. Examining the how and the why you are not confident will put you on the first step you need to build personal development and begin tackling it rather than just accepting it as ‘part of who you are’ . After all you cannot see where you are going in a dark room unless you put the light on first!.

I hope you found this information helpful. For a no cost video showing you step-by-step how to overcome negative thinking patterns please visit http://www.buildpersonaldevelopment.com